March 4th, 2013

Watch how the dawn makes everything seem safe. But I know better, and have come to trust only what I have thoroughly investigated.

Let none stay sick on the inside, or inside we stay. Let none prefer the safety of illusion, over an inconvenient truth . What heavy heads we all have. What golden dreams we pursue, while still fully in our nightmares.

All around me, people fade out the week, where once it was closed. Conversations that were once boisterous and inviting, are now muted and safe. There were eyes open to the world around, where now somnambulists shuffle along in a bizarre march toward painted borders. Russian rivers now hold tepid waters. It never rains anymore, the earth is cracking to expose the core. And this is what I wanted, just not like this.

On days like these, I remember the child that never was. I feel that I am a woman that made the right decision, as much as I feel an emptiness that does not cause me any pain. I think of the father that never was, no longer harboring ill will. I think of every choice I had the courage to make, and I feel a serenity that cannot be disturbed.

March 4th, 2013

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